Too Long To Be a Myface Status Update

Shirley feels like it's becoming increasingly difficult to recognize this once (way back in 2015 for example) wonderful country, because of the Supreme Court permitting the exclusion of immigrants based on religion, the government caging children they stole from non-violent parents, and the government turning away asylum seekers.  Oh, I guess the latter isn't new though, since FDR did the same thing to Jews during the Holocaust.  But it's still rather un-American.  Btw, if we're going to ban all the Muslims because many terrorists are Muslim, then shouldn't we ban all the white Christians because many mass shooters are white Christians?  And as long as we're on this digression regarding inconsistency, why are extremist conservatives so angry about government employees such as Sarah Huckabee Sanders being turned away from businesses, when those same extremist conservatives think it's proper for businesses to turn away a gay couple who want a cake for their wedding?  Since this Myface (Facebook) status update is so long, should it have been a blog post instead?  Yes, yes it should.  And so it is.

#MAGALIWI2015 (Hashtag Make America Great Again Like It Was In 2015)

In Defense of Trump Supporters and Why They're Wrong

Before I get to the Trump supporters, I must write about the petition that is attempting to stop Trump and why I signed it.  I am politically opposed to Donald Trump, and I have grown to like Hillary Clinton, to the extent that I can like a politician, that is.  But those things have nothing to do with why I signed the Change Dot Org petition.  I signed it because Donald Trump is dangerous; he is a threat to everything that makes America great.  Did you see what I did there?  I turned his motto against him.  I go girl.

The petition is asking the electors to not vote for Trump even if they're "supposed" to since the whole point of the Electoral College is to keep the people from voting for someone who is unfit for the presidency.  Since Hillary won the popular vote anyway, going "against" what the electors are "supposed" to do wouldn't actually oppose the will of the people.  I think the other point of the Electoral College is to help the smaller states be more represented, but I feel like that is less important than the popular vote and the understanding that Trump is dangerous.  I don't know if the petition will actually make a difference, but I signed it anyway, because it's something I can do.  I did hesitate before signing because of things like democracy and the peaceful transition of power, but decided to do it for the reasons I just stated.

I want to be clear regarding my reasons for signing the petition: it isn't because I disagree with Trump politically, even though I do.  This isn't about politics.  It's because he is dangerous.  I would never have signed such a petition against George W. Bush, for example, even though Al Gore won the popular vote and even though I knew (and was proven correct) that W would start wars, run the country into the ground economically, and stifle stem cell research.  Those are political things; he was not a danger to the very fabric of what America stands for. 

As I understand it, the main purpose of the Electoral College is to prevent a demagogue from becoming president.  I have to admit, I had to look up the definition of demagogue to gain a clearer and better understanding of what the eff that means.  Alarmingly, both Google's and Webster's definitions of demagogue seem to be providing frighteningly precise descriptions of Donald Trump's behavior.  The Google definition is clearer: "a political leader who seeks support by appealing to popular desires and prejudices rather than by using rational argument."

And now, onto the actual purpose of this post: my defense of Trump supporters.  Before I defend them, I shall offend them.

There are many (two that I know of anyway) people who feel that many Trump supporters are some form of piece of crap, or deplorable, as Hillary more eloquently put it.  I don't think she was wrong to make that statement, since the things she was describing are unquestionably deplorable, and she was obviously not talking about all Trump supporters.  This deplorable sect of supporters seem to be racist, homophobic, white supremacists, opposed to religious freedom, etc, etc, etc.  I am quite sure that there is at least a portion of Trump supporters that fit these categories of pieces of crap, evidenced by the fact that the KKK support Trump, since the KKK is obviously composed of pieces of crap as described here.  For the record, I don't think the pieces of crap are limited to the KKK, based on things I've heard from non-KKK Trump supporters.  However, I am quite sure that these categories do not apply to all Trump supporters; in fact, I personally know at least one who is none of those deplorable things.  But even the non-deplorable among them have chosen to elect a distributor of deplorable; I saw on Myface (Facebook) a post that stated that all Trump supporters might not be racist, but racism wasn't a deal-breaker for them.  That sums it up nicely, I think.  So now that I have offended the Trump supporters, I shall, at long last, defend them.

I will not be defending the deplorable portion of Trump supporters, i.e. the racists, homophobes, misogynists, etc.  I will be defending the ones who are not deplorable, for whom deplorable things about Trump were not a deal-breaker.

As crazy as it sounds, I think there are people who wanted to vote for someone who holds their political views.  Some of those people, mostly Republicans probably, only saw one political option, and it wasn't Hillary Clinton.  To be honest, while I understand the political opposition to Hillary by Republicans, it strikes me as odd since she seems moderate to me, and therefore potentially appealing to both parties.  But then again, I also think the same thing of President Obama and John McCain, both of whom are opposed by the other party.  Perhaps this is reflective of people's inability to compromise on anything.  But I digress.

Those Republicans were left with one awful candidate who claims to hold their Republican views, and I think they felt like they couldn't bear to vote for someone on the Democratic side, even though she is moderate.  Oh, I guess the above paragraph wasn't actually a digression after all.  They couldn't bear to compromise their political views, even if it meant electing a dangerous demagogue.

I had trouble empathizing with these voters, until I really imagined myself in their position (I'm normally better at empathy than that, I think).  I imagined a scenario in which an alleged Democratic version of Trump (so Trump from a few years ago then) but with the current state of crazies would run against a Republican whom I find vile as a person (because it seems there are people who hate Hillary as a person as well as a politician) and whose political views are contrary to mine.  So Ted Cruz.  I imagined a Democratic but still just as dangerous version of Trump running against Ted Cruz.  What would I do?  I disagree with Cruz on probably everything, and I don't like anything about him at all.  But he's not a danger to our beloved country the way Trump is.  Cruz wouldn't start a nuclear war because someone hurt his feelings on Twitter.  He wouldn't scapegoat entire races of people the way Hitler did.  He wouldn't attack journalistic freedom.  I would like to believe that I would be able to look past the politics, since this really isn't about politics, and vote for the person who is least evil and least dangerous for our country and its people.  I think I would be able to do that, as hard as it would be to vote for Ted Cruz, because ever since I was little, I understood that politics is always a choice of bad and worse, and we must vote for the lesser of the evils.  In my scenario, Ted Cruz is clearly the lesser of evils when compared to Trump.  While I believe I would ultimately make the right choice and cast the sane vote for Ted Cruz, it would be an incredibly hard decision to make and it would hurt my soul to cast that vote.  So I understand the non-deplorable Trump supporters; it probably would have been too hard for them to vote for Hillary.

And now, I shall get to the part about why the Trump supporters I just defended are wrong.  I do understand how hard their decision was, but they made the wrong one.  They should have been stronger; they should have made the difficult decision to vote against their views that are merely political, and vote for the person who is not a danger to our beloved country and beautiful Earth.  They made the wrong decision.  Now we must all suffer the consequences.  This isn't about politics.

More Economics from a Dummy

The following has existed as an unpublished draft for more than a year with the second half added a few months ago.  Most of it is probably not relevant anymore.  Enjoy!

As I explained previously, I know just about nothing about economics and my interest in it is nearly non-existent as well, to the extent that I would rather learn about the cell biology of how grass grows or the quantum physics of how paint dries than about economics. However, I have been thinking a little bit about some of the things I put forth in my economic theory, and I think I need to add to it. Like most sequels, this is not as good as the first one.

Fun with Flat Taxes

One of the disjointed parts of my theory involved a flat tax for all. Recently, flat taxes have been the topic of ridicule via the ridicule of Herman Cain’s 9-9-9 plan. I learned about that plant from a chart someone posted on Facebook, and some googling I did later (though I apparently didn't save the links I learned from). It seems that Herman Cain would charge a 9% income tax for people and corporations, and a 9% national sales tax to either replace or add to state taxes. I’m not clear on the latter because I’m not clear on the difference between the apples and oranges he keeps talking about in the clips of debates I’ve seen on The Daily Show and/or Colbert Report (like this one). Herman Cain would also remove all tax deductions. Based on other clips of things I’ve seen on The Daily Colbert (here's one), it seems that Rick Perry also has a flat tax plan where he would charge 20% taxes for all while keeping tax deductions in place.  (Herman Cain and Rick Perry were Republican candidates who lost the primaries for the 2012 presidential election.  These now-obscure references are partially what render this blog posting no longer relevant.)

Obviously, Herman Cain and Rick Perry got these ideas from my blog, because there is simply no other possible explanation of how one could think of a flat tax or simplifying the overly complicated tax code. I spoke of a flat tax, as part of my three-disjointed-pronged economic plan that could easily make me president, and they took that idea and added some stuff that I do not approve of and never intended for. Please note: I am not crazy (at least in this respect), nor am I serious about having any part in Herman Cain’s or Rick Perry’s plan making.

Lots of people (well, at least one person) feel that Herman Cain’s 9-9-9 plan is a terrible idea, and I agree for the reasons those people state. Someone at the Huffington Post explained that it would end up taxing lower income people a bit more than they are currently taxed, and it would drastically reduce taxes for corporations and the very wealthy by a lot. I haven’t googled Rick Perry’s plan, but it seems like it might be an improvement on Cain’s plan.  Clearly, that’s quite an endorsement, since it is coming from my uneconomical brain via my blog-typing fingers, I mean digits (because digits are economically related!).

While Herman Cain’s flat tax plan is clearly not fair and good, I still believe that my flat tax plan could be fair and good. My plan is extremely vague, which leaves it open to suggestions from people who know about the economics. If you don’t feel like going back and reading about my plan, I will re-state it and de-Cain it here: We should pick some percentage, and charge that percentage of tax to all people. I don’t know what that percentage would be, but I would want it to be a fair one for all. Furthermore, this would only apply to taxable people, and says nothing about how to tax corporations. Despite what the Supreme Court says, I cannot include corporations in the semantics of “People”; my brain simply won’t allow it. Thus, how to tax corporations is another thing that is left vague in my tax plan for people smarter and more knowledgeable than I to handle when I become president. I’m kidding of course -- I still won’t run for president. Anyhoo, my tax plan would not have anything to do with sales tax, since I would never have thought of changing the way sales tax is, and after reading the Huff-Po article, it’s clear that it would be wrong to give the power of sales tax to the Federal Government. Regarding Herman Cain’s removal of all tax deductions, I think I would leave that vague also, because I think some deductions are good, so long as they don’t allow people to screw over the government via loopholes and abuses and such. Yes, I think that is sufficiently vague to ensure success.

Speculators are Evil! Eeeeeeviiiiiil!

One of the other disjointed portions of my theory states that commodities trading is wrong and should be eradicated. Later, it occurred to me that there is a precedent for my proposed illegalization of commodities trading: insider trading! Like insider trading, commodities trading hurts the whole economy while benefiting a few traders. I assume that is why insider trading is illegal, and so, commodities trading should be too.

Political Predictions

This does not in any way bring me to another disjointed, unrelated point.  This point is so unrelated, in fact, that it has very little to do with economics.  Jon Stewart delineated the bizarre doomsday-like predictions Republican presidential candidates make and have made in the past regarding the horrors that would befall this great land if Obama was/is (re)-elected.  He highlighted the bizarreness of these predictions by emphasizing that the previous predictions have not come to fruition.  This brought to my mind the predictions I made about what could happen if George W. Bush were elected president.  The difference, however, is that my predictions came true, except that W. was not actually elected (the first time anyway).

At the time of my correct predictions, this blog did not exist.  Instead, I had a verbal blog, i.e. I occasionally told people what my thoughts were.  Thus, I verbally pre-blogged (or “told”) at least one family member or friend (but probably more than one) that if George W. Bush became president, we would undoubtedly go to war, and the economy would suffer.  Obviously both things happened.

The economy thing could have happened anyway.  From what I barely understand, it seems that it is possible that the economy simply goes through cycles, and whoever is president at the time either gets credit for a strong economy, or is blamed for a bad economy.  However, I’m pretty sure President W. Bush caused all these economic problems we have now that I am trying to fix via this blog.  I know this because I heard during Mr. W. Bush’s campaign that he ran every business he had ever owned into the ground, so I naturally deduced that he would therefore run this country into the ground, since its economy is but a giant business (or so I assume).

I knew that Present W. Bush would bring us to war because he stated during his campaign that if anyone, in any way, attacked us or harmed us or whatever, we would go to war.  He said this in such a way that sounded to me as if he were looking to go to war, and would react to any trigger with war.  Clearly, that made me nervous.

So, to conclude, I was right, but I wasn’t making crazy predictions based on nothing; I was making accurate predictions based on things I heard during a presidential campaign.  Furthermore, I am a predicting genius!  But I sill won’t run for president!

Gaga Farming

My obsession with Zynga’s FarmVille has finally amounted to something undeniably worthwhile and wonderful, in that Lady Gaga and FarmVille have joined together for the best promotion ever. The awesome GagaVille promotion allows us farmers to listen to the whole Born this Way album three days early.

I absolutely love this album, and I think it’s the only thing I’ve been listening to for the past couple of days. About half the album made my brain rejoice immediately, and the songs that I didn’t instantly love grew on me very quickly. The songs range from good to amazing.

GagaVille itself is pretty awesome too; with all the cool crystals, unicorns, and electric roses, my Gaga-fied farm has become quite shiny, and the GagaVille farm is the most bizarrely beautiful farm ever. This promotion makes me wonder if Gaga farms too, and I bet she does! That makes me love her even more! It’s nice when two obsessions join together to form one ginormous sparkly obsession.

UPDATE: May 23, 2011

Now that this magnificent album has officially been released, I have discovered that what was streaming in GagaVille was not the whole album (that is if I’m remembering the stream correctly, which I might not be). Anyway, now that I have the complete album via my GagaVille game card (which also came with remixes of “Born This Way” and “Judas”), and now that I have the tracks rather than a trackless stream, I can tell you which specific songs are amazing, in my opinion. Yes, I realize I could have easily found the track listing and done this before, but I didn’t so stop complaining.

Before I get to that, I feel that I should address the “Express Yourself” similarity of “Born this Way,” since it was just brought back to my attention by Weird Al Yankovic’s wonderful and funny parody, “Perform This Way.” I have noticed that at least one other song on Gaga’s album also sounds reminiscent of Madonna’s “Express Yourself,” and I think that elucidates the probable intentionality of Gaga’s invoking of that song. A large part of Gaga’s message is to be yourself, to show the world who you are, and thus, to express yourself. Gaga was very obviously influenced by Madonna, and I had assumed that was the extent of the “Express Yourself” similarity, but hearing Weird Al’s allusion in the context of his parody somehow crystallized for me that the similarity is likely not accidental. I heart Weird Al, and I heart Gaga.

Getting back to my thoughts regarding the Born this Way album, the following songs are amazing, and I think they are the same ones that my brain loved instantly. I will parenthetically refer to track numbers on the regular edition (the special edition comes with three additional songs and some remixes):

“Marry the Night” (Track 1)

“Government Hooker” (Track 3)

“Judas” (Track 4)

“Americano” (Track 5)

“Hair” (Track 6)

“SheiBe” (Track 7)

“Bloody Mary” (Track 8)

“Highway Unicorn (Road to Love)” (Track 10)

“The Edge of Glory” (Track 14)

That leaves the other songs that I either instantly thought were really good, or that grew on me to become really good. These opinions obviously refer to how I feel now, and that could obviously change in the future; as I listen to these songs ten billion more times, they might grow on me more to become amazing (or I might get sick of them). Nothing on the album sucks, or is even less than really good. That said, these are the just-very-good-right-now songs, in my arrogant opinion (just kidding, it’s humble):

“Born this Way” (Track 2)

“Bad Kids (Track 9)

“Heavy Metal Lover” (Track 11)

“Electric Chapel” (Track 12)

“You and I” (Track 13)

The three additional songs on the special edition version seem to fall under the “just really good and not yet amazing” category, which might be why they are not on the regular edition.

“Black Jesus + Amen Fashion” (Track 9 on Special Edition)

“Fashion of his Love” (Track 11 on Special Edition)

“The Queen” (Track 15 on Special Edition)

I heart Gaga.

Where are the 2012-ers?

DISCLAIMER: I absolutely do not intend to be insensitive or offensive to anyone or anything. Any statement that appears insensitive or offensive is intended as sarcasm and/or hyperbole (an exaggeration to make a point; I am providing that explanation so you don’t have to Google the definition as I once did). If anything offends anyone, I apologize sincerely in advance.

With all that’s going on with the 9.0 magnitude earthquake, tsunami, and radioactivity in Japan, where are all the people who have been insisting that an apocalypse is coming, particularly the ones who say it’s coming on December 21, 2012, or as my sister called them just now after I brought this up with her, the 2012-ers (patent pending…in my dreams!).

After other major disasters, such as Katrina and the Haitian earthquake, the 2012-ers and other Armageddon-ers were so quick to say those were signs of the upcoming apocalypse. However, the current Japanese disasters that are of much more Biblical proportions don’t seem to be generating the same apocalyptical warnings. Where are you, fear-mongering 2012-ers?

The current disasters seem so much more extreme than the previous ones, particularly since this time, nuclear radiation is involved, which could mean the beginning of some crazy genetic mutations, assuming humans survive at all. These disasters are far more doom-ridden than a mere ginormous hurricane and a mere 7.0 magnitude earthquake that happened in different locations.

I wonder if the difference is the perceived blasphemy happening in the location of the disasters. Maybe it’s only a sign of the apocalypse if the people are not strict Christians, like the blasphemous New Orleans people with their Mardi Gras and their New Orleans Voodoo, and the Vodou wielding Haitians. I’m pretty sure Christianity has infiltrated Japan, but then again, there must be lots of blasphemous Buddhists there too, so I really don’t understand where the Armageddon-ers are.

I found some 2012-ers when I googled for them (here is one example). It’s nice to see they are out there, mongering their fear, but they are not doing it loud enough, because I had to seek them out. Previously, they made themselves known, and I heard about them on the TV. Some religious extremists such as Glenn Beck are doing their traditional Pat Robertson-like blaming of the blasphemous, but there doesn’t seem to be enough Pat Robertson-like talk of the end of the world as we know it.

Come on, 2012-ers, you’re here, you fear, get loud about it!

UPDATE April 10, 2011
Finally, someone (that I’ve seen) made the connection between the 2012 apocalypse that the Mayans predicted and all the bad things happening now. And of course, it was that fear-monger (satirist) Jon Stewart! He also alluded to it during his beautiful farewell to Glenn Beck. Thank you, Jon Stewart!

Update May 7, 2011
OMG, I just discovered some relatives of the 2012-ers, and they are crazy – I mean they are May 21, 2011-ers. If you click on the “listen” thing here, you will hear that some of the May 21-ers sound like they are on drugs – seriously, their voices sound drugged to me, though I obviously make no claim regarding whether they actually are drugged. These people have left their families and quit their jobs because they are awaiting the rapture that will come on May 21, 2011. They explain that if you’re still here on May 22, then you are in Hell. I bet they will be in Hell, since they will have left their families and jobs for nothing and will then be left to either mend their burned bridges or find some way to move on from them, at least for the next 153 days, since that is when the universe will cease to exist. Maybe they can all join together and form a cult, or maybe they already have. Am I being too judgmental about the impending Judgment Day believers? Then I guess I’ll see you in Hell! Hahahahahahaha! Just kidding.

UPDATE May 20, 2011
When I wrote the previous update, I felt bad for the extent of my harshness, particularly the part about seeing ya’ll in Hell. However, I now feel better about that, since Stephen Colbert said the same thing, after providing a moving recap of Earth’s history. Thanks, Stephen Colbert!

UPDATE May 22, 2011

So, here we are in Hell. Hell seems an awful lot like Earth in the pre-Rapture days. The only apocalyptic sign that I witnessed was that in the part of Hell where I live, it was a beautiful sunny day until it suddenly became cloudy and rainy within an hour of the time of the Rapture, and the sun came back about an hour after. I guess G-d was being subtly apocalyptic. I didn’t see anyone floating up to the Heavens, but if you witnessed any floating virtuous people, feel free to comment below, Fellow Hell-dwellers.

UPDATE August 23, 2011


The 5.9 earthquake in Virginia that I felt in NY and that others felt throughout the Eastern part of the country (according to my Myface newsfeed and the CNN part of the TV) is clear and undeniable evidence of the apocalypse! This is particularly obvious since we are rapidly approaching December 21, 2012 and even more rapidly approaching October 21, 2011, Harold Camping’s new judgmentally apocalyptic prediction! Run!

AI Officially Sucks (IMHO)

(What? Artificial Intelligence sucks? That’s a weird thing for a Star Trek loving wannabe nerd like Yel to say. She must mean American Idol.)
Yes, dear Blog Reader, you’re absolutely right – I do think that Artificial Intelligence is cool and frightening, and that American Idol has suddenly begun to suck tremendously.

(Suddenly? Now? Hasn’t it been sucking for years?)

No, Blog Reader, not in my humble opinion. American Idol has been my delicious guilty pleasure for years – it has been, with one exception, the only reality TV I watch. Furthermore, I’ve been obsessed with it to varying degrees over the years, ranging from absolutely having to watch every second of every episode with no distractions at all, voting every time I could, and taking notes while watching to make good voting decisions, to watching casually with the pre-existing mind-set that I won’t vote that season because I don’t need the stress. I watched both for the contestants, and for the judge’s remarks, valuing Simon Cowell’s thoughts above the rest. I would inevitably fall in love with at least two or three contestants, and I am still a huge fan of some of them (most notably Adam Lambert, Chris Daughtry, Kelly Clarkson, Carrie Underwood, and David Cook).

When I learned of Cowell’s departure from the program, I wondered if I would continue to enjoy the show. When I learned that Jennifer Lopez would be one of the new judges, I thought that would surely end my love of American Idol. I know everyone seems to love her, and I kind of like her as an actress and sometimes as herself, but I really, really don’t like her music or voice at all, and I often find her personality irritating and fake. I almost didn’t watch the current season of Idol, but I couldn’t help myself for two reasons. First, I realized that I usually watch primarily because of a few contestants each year. Second, I learned that the second new judge would be Steven Tyler. I love Aerosmith and Steven Tyler, so I had to watch, even if it was just for him.

So I did, and I have been enjoying it, even the parts where J-Lo talks. I haven’t been feeling those annoying fake vibes from her too much, though they are definitely present at times. I’ve been enjoying a few of the contestants a lot. I have been enjoying Steven Tyler, who has surpassed my high expectations of him and who shows his musical genius and rock star qualities. I have also been enjoying Randy Jackson as I always have. However, I have missed Cowell’s blunt honesty and musical judging abilities, Too many contestants are praised far too much, as is evidenced by the larger than normal group of Hollywood contenders. Idol acts like that large group resulted from the allegedly amazing talent that has allegedly surpassed the talent of previous years, but to me it is obvious that it has simply resulted from the less-than-Cowell judging of the new judges. Too many contestants have been extolled as I stare baffled at the TV, as I wonder if something has gone wrong with my musical taste or my brain or something.

These are not, however, the reasons why American Idol now sucks. I didn’t expect the judging to be of the same Cowell caliber of the past. I knew things would be different, and I was accepting of this. Even when it became clear that too many people made it through the first round of auditions, I thought everything would work out in the end, since they would have to be whittled down to the much smaller group of contestants, which, I assumed, would be the really, truly talented group.

That whittling has happened during the Hollywood episodes, and it was Wednesday’s (and Thursday's) whittling that initiated the sucking Idol.

SPOILER ALERT - American Idol Top 24

To put it simply, Chris Medina did not make it to the final 24 and Clint Jun Gamboa did. Chris, the guy who dedicates his life to taking care of his car-accident-surviving fiancé, might be one of the kindest human beings on earth. On the other hand, Clint, the contestant that kicked a sweet young boy (his fellow contestant, 15 year-old Jacee Badeaux) out of his group during the preparations for one of the big Hollywood eliminations, might be, at worst an evil a-hole and at best a d-bag. More importantly for this American Idol singing competition, Chris Medina sings well, and Clint Jun Gamboa does not. Chris sings with emotion, which, in my opinion, is the most essential part of singing. Clint is one of the people whose praise I couldn’t comprehend.

I hate to seem insensitive, but I can’t help but wonder if J-Lo was told to cry about Chris Medina’s elimination. They probably realized that if she cried, America couldn’t possibly think badly of American Idol for eliminating Chris Medina. Perhaps I’m reading too much into it.

I don’t know if I’m gong to continue to watch American Idol (I most likely will because there are a few remaining contestants that I do like). If they had eliminated both Chris and Clint, I wouldn’t be so bothered, but the fact that they actually think Clint is better than Chris is simply unsettling. Perhaps even more unsettling is that American Idol thinks the barely talented Clint Jun Gamboa is a better singer than Colton Dixon.

American Idol forced us to compare Colton Dixon and Brett Loewenstern and it’s obvious that the former is vastly better than the latter. However, American Idol’s decision to place Brett rather than Colton in the Top 24 is not as troubling as their hopefully ill-fated decision to keep Clint in the competition (to clarify, by “ill-fated” I simply mean that I hope he is the first of the 24 to be kicked out of American Idol by America). Brett is obviously a sweet and kind young man and clearly does have some talent. The funny thing is that the judges mentioned that Brett has had a difficult life so far and Colton is simply a great singer. Chris also has a difficult life, and is also a sweet and kind man, yet he didn’t make it into the top 24 despite the evidence that those qualities do matter.

I am certain that Chris Medina and Colton Dixon will do well in the recording industry with or without further help from American Idol.  However, since American Idol obviously helps move things along for people’s music careers, hopefully the two of them will return as wild cards, assuming the wild cards will return this year.  Perhaps that was the plan all along.

UPDATE March 1, 2011
They have confirmed that there will be wildcard contestants this year.

SPOILER ALERT – Lost Season 6 “The End”

I apologize for the delay in posting this and the preceding two postings, but I haven’t been feeling well. The following was written on the night of the Lost finale (May 23, 2010) and in the days subsequent to it.

These are thoughts I’m having after the final episode of Lost, "The End," was over. See this blog posting for the thoughts I had during the episode, and this one for the thoughts I had during the retrospective before the final episode, “The Final Journey.”

Confirmed, Disconfirmed, and Non-Existent Predictions

Woohoo!!!!! I was finally proven right!!!!! When all hope was lost, I clung to some hope anyway, and I was right! I go girl! I am awesome, and you are more awesome for reading my blog and my correct predictions!!!!!!

Yes, Hurley finally became the new Jacob, or, more accurately, the new New Jacob! Jack, the first New Jacob, ordained Hurley as the new New Jacob before Jack sacrificed himself for the Island, his friends, and the world by fulfilling his life’s purpose of re-kindling the Light. While I didn’t predict that Jack would be an intermediary Jacob, I did have Jack as my back-up prediction, and I did recognize that both Jack and Hurley possessed the most Jacobliness, experienced the most personal growth, and seemed to have the most favor in Jacob’s eyes. In addition to the Hurley-is-the-new-Jacob portion of my prediction, I had also predicted that the Flash-Sideways was a creation of Hurley where he and his friends could live the happy fulfilling lives they were meant to live. I was almost correct, since Christian Shephard explains that the Flash-Sideways is an afterlife created by all of the Lost people in it such that they would be able to find each other. Personally, I believe that Hurley probably guided their efforts to create that afterlife, and since he was the new New Jacob, it is certainly possible.

I was completely and utterly wrong about what I insisted on calling the New Reality. It isn’t reality at all, which is why I will now give in and call it the Flash-Sideways like the rest of the world. The possibility that it wasn’t real, that it was an afterlife, never crossed my mind. As I’ve mentioned before, I would have felt that the island being Hell or an afterlife would be a huge cop-out, and that is why I refused to believe such a thing; perhaps that is also why it never crossed my mind that the Flash-Sideways might be an afterlife. Except that wasn’t a cop-out at all. It would have been so nice if it were real, and I think my hope that it was real was too strong to allow me to see any other possibilities. Also, I’m probably just not the world’s best Lost predictor, although you have to admit, I’m not too shabby.

I was right about there being a big Jack v. Fake Locke argument about Fate v. Coincidence, except in the more specific form of Everything Matters v. Nothing Matters. Obviously the argument was reversed, in that Jack has learned from Real John Locke (and from his experiences and ruminations and so forth) to be on the side of fate, and everything mattering, while Fake John Locke/The Smoke Monster/Man in Black was on the side of coincidence and nothing mattering. It’s possible that Fake Locke was only saying the things he said to screw with Jack, since he knew that could have been Jack’s weakness, if Jack wasn’t so strong and hot. I suppose his hotness probably has nothing to do with it though.

Plot

The short version of my analysis of what happened is pretty much what they told us happened. The island was real life, the New Reality/Flash-Sideways was not real, and was some kind of Heaven-like afterlife, or maybe a pre-Heaven thing, since they were all planning to move on when they were ready. Matthew Fox explained on Jimmy Kimmel’s Aloha to Lost that there is a religion where they believe that when you die, you don’t move on until you remember your death, how you died, and everyone involved. It seems our characters had to remember their life on the island in order to be ready to move on. Perhaps they also needed to accept certain things about themselves, and to let go. For example, Ben probably needed to work through and let go of his sins before he would be ready. It’s interesting that the Island was their true life, sine so many people, including myself at one point, thought the Island could be the afterlife, or even Hell.

The most important part of their lives was on the island, as Dead Christian Shephard explained to his dead son Jack, and so they somehow made sure they would be able to find each other there in the afterlife. They are all dead, but as Christian implied, they did not all die young, and we can assume that many of them lived long lives. I would imagine that Hurley and Ben probably lived the longest, since Hurley is the new Jacob and he appointed Ben as his Richard (i.e. as his guide, his number 2).

The man who plays Michael (Harold Perrineau) explained on Jimmy Kimmel that Michael will remain on the island, perhaps forever. I imagine that is because of evil things he did. Of course Ben did a lot more things that were horribly evil, yet he is in the pleasant afterlife and allowed to move on when he is ready (presumably), though it is taking a longer time for him to get there than the less evil people. I imagine Ben is not destined to be a ghost on the island because he redeemed himself – he turned good via his emotional breakthrough, and while he strayed briefly for the sake of survival, he came back to the side of Good, ultimately becoming the second in command, the advisor, the Richard to the good and pure Hurley.

I think Eloise Widmore/Hawking might have been ready to move on, but I don’t believe Charles Widmore or their son, Daniel Widmore/Faraday, were ready. I imagine this is why Eloise did not want Desmond to take her son with him; she wanted to keep her family together, because they belong together, just as our other characters belong together.


We now have confirmation of whether Charles Widmore is good or evil. Similar to Ben, he was evil, often for the sake of the Island and Jacob, but turned good, with the help of Jacob. Widmore had said that Jacob had visited him and convinced him to change his evil ways. I wasn’t sure I believed him at the time, but I do now. It makes sense, since he seemed to know things that Jacob would have told him, as did Eloise Hawking, whom Jacob probably also visited. There is now unquestionable evidence that Widmore is Good; he was in the same place as the rest of our Good characters, and was not left to be a ghost on the Island, as evil people are. Similar to Ben, he and perhaps Eloise were not ready to move on, perhaps because they still had to work through all the evil things they did before turning Good.


I have one problem with Lost (right now, maybe I’ll think of more later). Why didn’t Desmond or Jack turn into Smoke Monsters? Previous Jacob Lady told Jacob that if he ever went into the Light, he would suffer a fate worse than death, and when Jacob threw Man in Black into the Light, he turned into the Smoke Monster, demonstrating what Previous Jacob Lady meant. I understand why Desmond didn’t turn to smoke, since he is not immortal or divine, and therefore, it is not unreasonable to assume that different rules might apply. I suppose Jack didn’t turn to smoke because he was turning the Light back on and was therefore not going toward it, but was rather going away from it. I guess I cleared that smoke up for myself. Hahahahahaha! I made a pun!

The Island is under water in the Flash-Sideways, but they are in some kind of afterlife. This could mean that it’s so far into the future that the Island has sunken some time after Hurley’s time as Jacob. This is possible, since Christian Shephard explained that time does not exist there. Alternatively, and this is the way I’m leaning, since this afterlife is a better version of their lives, as the producers said in “The Final Journey” and I suggested early in the season, in this life, the Island and Jacob are not exerting their effects on our characters. It wasn’t the Island that made their time on the island the greatest time of their lives, it was the people, and that is why they created that Heaven such that they could find each other again.


Purgatory

Jimmy Kimmel and some people on Myface (Facebook) have concluded that the Island was some kind of Purgatory. I personally don’t believe this, and there is evidence against it. In the Flash-Sideways, when each character peacefully and happily realized they were dead and accepted it with tremendous peace, they had memories of the Island – their lives flashed before their eyes. Why would such a critical moment come with memories of time spent in Purgatory rather than memories from the greatest part of a person’s life, particularly when this is all happening in a fictional drama show on the TV? Of course, the Island is bizarre, and crazy, supernatural things happen there, but this is fiction, and it was presented in a way that allowed for very comfortable suspended disbelief, at least in my opinion.

The Flash-Sideways might be some kind of purgatory, as a friend (and probably others) have suggested. I don’t believe it is Purgatory in what I understand to be the traditional sense. It was not a place of suffering, or a quasi-Hell, or soul purification, but it might be a place where people work out their issues – some sins, some just issues – and eventually accept and let go of whatever is necessary. For John Locke, he needed to let go of the sense that he needed to punish himself, and he needed to accept his disability so he could be freed from both. Jack needed to accept his father’s death and thereby let go of his father. Additionally, Jack also had to accept his father’s life, in that he had to accept the kind of person and father Christian Shephard was; that is why Jack has a son in the Flash-Sideways. Sayid needed to let go of the sense that he was evil, and needed to accept that he is good. Ben still needs to work through his many sins, since, like Sayid, he is also good, and he proved that in his life, just as Sayid proved he was still good when he (Sayid) sacrificed himself to save his friends. These are but a few examples; for each character, there was something to be accepted, something to work through, something to let go of; perhaps someday I will discuss more of them (but don't hold your breath). Once they were able to let go, when they were ready, they could leave; they could move on, perhaps to Heaven, perhaps to another part of Heaven, perhaps towards Nirvana. Regardless of what you believe, they moved on to something greater.

The Death of Jack

A friend suggested that Jack might have been the last to die, since he was the last to have his memories re-ignited. That got me thinking, when he died after climbing out of the Light, an eternity could have passed since Jack as the previous New Jacob might have become immortal or quasi-immortal. Since Rose and Bernard’s doggie was with him as he died, did Fake John Locke give our kind couple and their dog immortality when he promised Desmond they would never be hurt? If so, that’s nice of him, and provides further evidence that despite his intensely evil ways, Fake Locke/The Smoke Monster/Man in Black did have some glimmer of Good left in him Whether or not they were given quasi-immortality, Rose and Bernard did die eventually, since they were in the Flash-Sideways.

I think there is evidence that Jack died soon after Hurley’s Jacobification. As Jack lay dying, he saw the plane overhead flying away; this was probably the plane carrying his friends, and so Jack knew that they made it off the island. It is possible, however, that it was another plane, far in the future, since Ben pointed out to Hurley that Jacob’s rules of no one coming or going from the Island could be changed.

Jack died knowing that his death had purpose; he knew that the Island was saved and would be safe from the now dead Smoke Monster, and he knew that his friends had escaped the island. Fake John Locke/The Smoke Monster’s attempt to make Jack believe that he would die for nothing failed epically (I can’t believe I just said that hahahahaha…Epic fail).

I believe Jack took the longest to accept that he is dead because it took the longest for him to let go and have the emotional experience that would bring on the memories. As Locke had told him, Jack had to let go of his father, to accept his father’s death, and to accept his father for everything that he was and wasn’t. That was why Jack was a father in the Flash-Sideways, so he could experience what his father might have gone through – so that he might understand his father better. Jack never got closure for his father’s death; I don’t believe he ever did in his life, and he didn’t get a chance to have a funeral for him until the lost coffin was found and delivered in the Flash-Sideways. In his life, Jack was, in fact, plagued by his father appearing to be alive after he died via The Smoke Monster’s use of his corpse. In the Flash-Sideways, Jack finally had a chance to gain the closure he needed, and so when he touched the coffin, the memories from his life were finally ignited. He once again saw his father appearing to be alive, and his father could explain all that was happening. Jack was finally able to let go.

The Death of the Smoke Monster and the Life of Richard

It was interesting to see that the Light might have been holding Fake John Locke on the Island, and it was almost certainly the force that kept him indestructible. Only after the Light was extinguished could Kate’s Jack-saving bullet affect him, and only then could Jack kill the Smoke Monster. Therefore, I imagine the Light was also the mechanism by which Jacob’s gift of immortality worked on Richard; when it was extinguished, Richard began to age, and with the prospect of dying someday, he could finally enjoy the life he had left.

Conclusion (Because I’m not creative enough to come up with a better title for this concluding section)

I really did love this episode. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. It truly was satisfying, and, despite the many tears that flowed and despite the deathly ending, it was a happy ending. As a friend pointed out (yes, this friend is the one I keep mentioning in this posting), this episode provided much-needed closure, both for the characters, and for the show. They were all dead, but many of them probably led long lives. They might not have experienced all the happy things they should have in their lives, but they got to experience those things in an afterlife. They were all together, as they were supposed to be – as they were destined to be. Jacob selected them because they were alone like he was, but, thanks to Jacob, they weren’t alone anymore.

Best Comedy Album EVER!

UPDATE September 29, 2010
Myq Kaplan has become a cartoon!

UPDATE August 9, 2010 (08-09-10)
Myq Kaplan was a top 5 finalist on Last Comic Standing. I un-biased-ly (impartially?) believe he was the funniest one there. He should have won.

UPDATE August 10, 2010
Some evidence for my lack of bias regarding Myq Kaplan's superior hilarity can be found at Entertainment Weekly and The Examiner. For more Myq Kaplan fun, here is an interview someone had with him.
Update: Friday August 13, 2010 (Happy Friday the 13th!): Here is another rather fantastic interview.

This blog posting is extremely biased, because I think I’m cool because I know the subject of it, Myq Kaplan. So take my over-hyping with a grain of salt, and bear in mind that I would probably feel similarly even if I didn’t know him.


One of the greatest comedy albums ever was released this week: Myq Kaplan’s Vegan Mind Meld. I could listen to it a thousand times, and, like a good Simpsons episode, I would find it funny every time.

Myq Kaplan builds jokes as a master chef might build a delicious layer cake (please note: I have never built a cake, but I have seen Alton Brown build a cake on Food Network). Every line is a delicious layer; each layer could stand alone, and the layers come together and build upon each other to form delicious hilarity. Now I want some cake.

I went to college with Myq Kaplan, but I didn’t really know him too well; I’m an excessively shy freak, so I tend not to make friends with people (or, you know, talk to them), as much as I might want to. What I did know, however, was that he is hilarious, genuinely kind, and ridiculously intelligent. Myq was in all the funniest classes that I took in college – obviously his funnies had something to do with that, unless maybe Semantics is just naturally hilarious.

When I found him on Facebook about two years ago, I was very happy to see that one of the funniest people I’ve ever encountered had become an actual stand-up comedian – everything was right with the world. At the time, he was going to be on Comedy Central’s Live at Gotham. His success continued to grow; a few months ago, he was on The Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien, and now (well, last night) he was on Comedy Central again, this time on Comedy Central Presents Myq Kaplan, which was obviously hilarious.

Myq Kaplan’s growing success brings me tremendous joy for two reasons: 1)A genuinely kind, talented, funny, and deserving person is gaining success, and 2) I know a famous person who I’ve seen on the TV three times. Therefore, as I said in the beginning of this blog posting, I think I’m so cool! Oh, also there’s a third reason: 3) His success means I get to hear and see his humor more.

Perhaps the title of this blog posting is a slight exaggeration, and perhaps it is partially motivated by some bias. However, all biases aside, Myq Kaplan and his CD are really quite funny.

I’m Still with Coco

UPDATE May 4, 2010: Conan O'Brien had a nice interview on 60 Minutes.

As everyone except me has known for more than a week now, Conan O’Brien will be on TBS this November at 11 P.M. I only found out the other day when the TV mentioned it; I guess that’s what happens when I don’t keep up with the Twitter or Facebook fan pages or the news in general.


As the title of this blog posting clearly states, I am still with Coco, and I think I always will be Team Conan. I heart Conan; he is talented, funny, and smart.

However, I’m not a big fan of this whole TBS thing. That is not to say that I wouldn’t watch Conan on TBS; I will definitely watch Conan wherever he goes. No one seems to know whether Conan chose not to go to Fox or if Fox chose not to reap the long-term benefits of having Conan, but I do think whoever it was who passed on a Conan-Fox relationship made a huge mistake. I’ve read that Fox might have chosen against having Conan in their late-night time slots because of contracts with lucrative syndicated reruns, and I understand why it would probably be better for Fox in the short term to say “no” to Coco. However, as a broadcasting layperson, I would imagine that Conan O’Brien could do for late-night Fox what David Letterman did for late-night CBS. As far as I knew, there was no reason to watch CBS after primetime (during the times when CBS has had good TV happening during primetime) before Letterman got there, but now, CBS is a prime destination during the late-night hours (for my DVR anyway). I firmly believe that Conan would have the same effect for Fox, though the situation is slightly different in that I do occasionally watch those reruns (such as The Simpsons) that I mentioned.

Speaking of those reruns, that is precisely what Conan will be following when he is on TBS. Obviously, that will be a better lead-in than Jay Leno was when Conan was hosting The Tonight Show, but Fox primetime programming (such as House MD) would be vastly better.

Speaking of lead-ins, it’s funny that Team Leno people, such as the author of this thing from Baltimore, recognize that Jay Leno was a horrible lead-in for the late local news, but at the same time, they don’t seem to get that Leno’s horrible lead-in abilities were the obvious and direct cause of Conan’s poor ratings while he was hosting The Tonight Show. That rather dim article praises Leno for leading in the late-night ratings now that he is back not being funny on The Tonight Show (rather than not being funny in primetime), not appearing to realize that The Tonight Show now has the ratings-causing lead-ins that Leno had always enjoyed but Conan’s Tonight Show never did. That article is filled with bizarre oblivion regarding Leno’s detrimental effects on The Tonight Show’s ratings when he was in primetime. Leno is not the ratings leader because of talent, likeability, humor, guests, or any other quality-related characteristics; it is purely because of the primetime programming that serves as the lead-in for the late local news, The Tonight Show, and Late Night. If Leno’s ratings truly did result from any kind of Leno-ness, then his ratings would have would not have sunken so low when he was in primetime, but obviously, The Jay Leno Show’s ratings were painfully low.

Getting back to funny and talented people, Conan O’Brien will do well no matter where he goes. Some have suggested that he can’t compete with The Daily Show with Jon Stewart and The Colbert Report (or Colbert Nation, what the article I just linked to incorrectly called it), but that really doesn’t make sense. The latter shows re-air several times the next day and can be viewed in their entirety online. Additionally, most people have DVRs or other ways to record the TV for later viewing, so people will watch all three shows, as well as Letterman. They will also watch Leno, but only because they will not have changed the channel after Law and Order.

Some people seem to be suggesting that Conan is pulling a Leno (my words, not theirs). The NY Post claims that George Lopez, whose show (Lopez Tonight) Conan will be bumping from 11 P.M. where it currently lives to 12 A.M., was forced to be on Team Conan. This claim has been denied by representatives of George Lopez and TBS. As far as I know, Conan has not responded, however, if this claim is true, I would imagine that it was not Conan who would force George Lopez to support him. If someone really did that, it would presumably be TBS executives. Regarding the Leno-Conan brouhaha, I have argued several times that NBC executives are more to blame than Leno, though a portion of the responsibility does lie on Leno. In this case, regarding the allegedly fake Conan support, there is a good chance that Conan is free from blame. However, regarding the actual moving of George Lopez’s show to a later time, obviously Conan had to be aware of that when he made his deal, and in that sense, one could (and has) argued that he is being Leno-esque. However, there is a vast difference between George Lopez’s show being moved and Conan O’Brien’s Tonight Show being forced to either move or be taken away. The Tonight Show is a television institution, George Lopez’s show is not; the former has been on before midnight for several decades, the latter has not. No offense to George Lopez, but I, and presumably many others, were only vaguely aware that he had a late night show, but everyone knows that The Tonight Show is on, and everyone knew that Conan was the host. Conan is only causing the time-shifting of what I imagine might be a rather unpopular show to a later time; Conan is not causing a firmly established, well-known program to be jolted out of its home, nor is he forcing its host to leave. The situations are very different; Conan is not pushing a popular program into a time slot where it will become less viewed, rather, he is increasing the chances that an unpopular show will likely gain popularity by being on after Conan, that is, by providing a healthy lead-in.

New Scrubs RIP

'Twas a sad day on March 22, 2010, when I gazed upon the Myface (Facebook) status of the great Zach Braff.

"Many of you have asked, so here it is: it appears that "New Scrubs", "Scrubs 2.0", "Scrubs with new kids", "Scrubbier", "Scrubs without JD" is no more. It was worth a try, but alas... it didn't work. Zb"

The end of New Scrubs wasn’t terribly troubling, simply because we had already been through what we believed was the end of Scrubs. We had been through it twice in fact: first, when NBC attempted to prematurely murder it, then again after ABC kindly resuscitated it for what was supposed to be a year to allow them to end the series properly, only to breathe more life into it for this, its real final year. Therefore, I was certainly prepared in that I had already grieved the end of the fabulous show; I knew we were on borrowed time. Nonetheless, I really enjoyed New Scrubs, and it was sad to see that it will not return.

I really liked New Scrubs, although when I first heard there was going to be a ninth season of Scrubs after what I thought was the real series finale, I was concerned. I was sure Scrubs was going to jump the shark the way Happy Days did when Richie Cunningham left and was replaced by his cousin or something (you thought I was going to say when Fonzie literally jumped the shark, didn’t you? Well you were wrong). However, Scrubs definitely did not jump any sharks at all, and there were indications that it wouldn’t before it premiered. Zach Braff seemed to have confidence in it, and I trust comedians, though I remained skeptical since all the entertaining people promote things they are a part of. Zach Braff also defended Scrubs’ continuation, explaining that New Scrubs would provide employment for numerous people. Furthermore, the Scrubs Myface (Facebook) fan page posted this article on Myface before New Scrubs began, where the author seemed to have concerns similar to mine, but was pleasantly surprised with what New Scrubs would bring.

When New Scrubs finally began, I discovered first hand that it definitely did not suck. It wasn’t just Scrubs without JD – it had changed enough, in the setting and with some new characters, that it was almost a different, almost-as-great show. Despite the slight changes, it still had a lot of the original Scrubsiness of the show, via some permanently returning beloved characters, some occasionally returning beloved characters, and the same amazing writing and humor that graced the first eight seasons. They transitioned beautifully into this New Scrubs; they allowed me to fall in love with the new characters as I had fallen in love with the original characters before. It was so perfectly done that they could have – and part of me feels they should have – made New Scrubs a spin-off rather than a ninth season. The new characters weren’t replacements or clones of other characters; there were some similarities, but the new characters were unique. For example, Lucy was not a clone of JD or Elliot, but she clearly exhibited some of their traits while maintaining her own unique and lovable characteristics. I love Lucy (hehehe, I think that’s why they named her Lucy), and I love New Scrubs. I would watch more New Scrubs if it were on. I will watch New Scrubs reruns where I find them on the TV and on the DVDs that I will buy.

However, I need a new show to replace New Scrubs – a new New Scrubs if you will. I was informed recently of a relatively new programme called Modern Family, and I was told I would love it, and that it is worth the addiction that would surely ensue. My informant was right; I watched one episode on abc.com, entitled “Fifteen Percent” (it was the oldest episode still there at that time), and I loved it. It was hilarious, with a bit of an Arrested Development-ness about it, and I already love many if not all of the characters. The reflective introspection that comes from the mockumentary style of it, as well as the lovability of all the characters give it a nice sense of Scrubsiness. I believe Modern Family shall be my new New Scrubs.

I encountered several fun surprises while watching Modern Family. First, Kristen Schaal showed up at the door of the show (I don't believe she is a recurring character), causing me to exclaim to myself (but aloud of course), “Hey, that’s the girl from The Daily Show!” Towards the end of the episode, I suddenly realized, and once again exclaimed aloud to myself, “Omg! That’s Al Bundy!” Indeed, the main character of Modern Family is Ed O’Neill. My excitement grew. As a side note, it’s nice that ABC is taking care of most of the Bundys; Al Bundy (Ed O'Neill) is on Modern Family, Kelly Bundy (Christina Applegate) is on Samantha Who, Peggy Bundy (Katey Sagal) has a recurring role on Lost; where is Bud Bundy (David Faustino)? Perhaps ABC should turn his web series Star-ving into a TV show, or give him some other show, to complete the Bundy fun. Getting back to the fun surprises on that Modern Family episode, at the end of the episode, I was shocked to see the 20th Century Fox thingie – this show is on ABC, but apparently is produced by Fox! That’s crazy! Finally, when I went to write this blog posting, as I searched through Zach Braff’s Myface page looking for the article above that I ended up finding on the Scrubs Myface page, I noticed that Zach Braff also enjoys and recommended Modern Family. Everything came together beautifully.

UPDATE May 26, 2011
At some point since writing this posting, I have discovered that the more accurate new New Scrubs is the funny and Scrubs-like Cougar Town, because Cougar Town is a Bill Lawrence creation, as were Scrubs and New Scrubs.