World, I mean Word Coming to an End!

I was shocked to learn today that some small company from America Junior (Canada, as Homer Simpson called it) claims to have a 1998 patent for the way Microsoft Word works (something about the XML implementation, like I know what that means) and they're forcing poor, poor Microsoft to stop selling Word and Office on January 11, 2010. This will screw over computer sellers and stores that sell Word and Office, and obviously it will screw over every business on Earth, every student on Earth, and every computer-using person on Earth.

So the world won't end on 12/21/12, it will end on 1/11/10, or the Word will anyway.

I think it’s patently clear (pun intended) that the Canadian company is a vengeful one, since its name is i4i.

Fortunately, the copies of Word and Office that we already have will still be supported by Microsoft, and hopefully they'll be able to fix the patent-infringing problem before doomsday.

UPDATE February 1, 2010
I guess I should have updated this on 01.11.10, but I guess I was too distracted by all the excitement of Binary Palindrome Day.

Anyway, Doomsday came and went, and both the world and Word continued to exist. Microsoft was forced to remove the XML thingie from all copies of Word 2007 and Office 2007 sold on or after that day, and they are required to pay $290 million in damages. Microsoft is appealing this decision, particularly the damages part, in hopes that they will reduce that massive sum, for the sake of the future (since they don’t want to set a precedent for such a large amount in damages).

I know it’s “wrong” to root for big business, but I can’t help it – I hope Microsoft succeeds.

Double Standards

Tiger Woods and his wife (Elin Nordegren) have provided a real-life alleged example demonstrating the point that I made in a previous blog posting, when the former appeared to have been scratched and beaten with a golf club by the latter before and/or after an alleged car accident, allegedly resulting from an alleged argument between them regarding Woods’ alleged adulterous affairs. The alleged domestic violence portion of all this was denied by Tiger Woods, and dropped quickly by the Florida Highway Patrol, according to this article from The Examiner.

Ironically, Chris Brown (of all people) actually made a nice point (see the Examiner link above) regarding the double standard in our society that I delineate in my discussion of Pink’s lyrics in the above-mentioned blog posting. Our society seems to be significantly less harsh on female perpetrators of domestic violence than male ones. If this situation were reversed, would an investigation of Tiger Woods’ hypothetical alleged violence toward his wife end so quickly? Would the world be so focused on Elin Nordegren’s hypothetical alleged affairs, or would the world be unwaveringly focused on the domestic violence?

Regarding Woods’ affairs, as I’ve said regarding David Letterman’s affairs, it isn’t our business. It is unquestionably wrong, but it is not our business. If Elin Nordegren did assault Woods, that is the real issue. As immoral and despicable as adultery is, assault, even for the sake of vengeance, is far more immoral and criminal. The infidelity of a celebrity is not our business, particularly when that celebrity has spent his public life protecting his and his family’s privacy. If his wife did assault him, he is a victim; if he were a woman, more people might recognize that, and perhaps the investigation into whether domestic violence occurred might have at least appeared more thorough, or might have taken longer than four days to be completed.

If the situation were reversed, the investigation would not have ended so quickly, and people wouldn’t be so focused on the wife’s hypothetical alleged affairs. The world would be making proclamations of “so what if she had affairs, that doesn’t excuse violence against her.” The same should be true in this alleged situation.

Who Doesn’t Love Shiny Objects?!

I’m not a fashion expert by any means, but I appreciate beauty in any form, ByJuliePie tops and dresses (discussed here by someone who does seem to have fashion expertise) effortlessly fit that description, just as anyone can effortlessly wear these works of art, as you can see at the ByJuliePie Etsy store and Facebook page.

Not only does Julie use ornate buttons, and colorful tie-dyes, but she also uses shiny objects on her one-of-a-kind embellished ByJuliePie tops and dresses. Not just any shiny object, but the shiniest – Swarovski crystals!

The cute tops and dresses burst with Julie’s creativity, and maintain a nice balance of creative artistry and shimmering glamour. What could easily become overwhelming, too-much-going-on, or even tacky never does; rather, everything always seems to remain simply and perfectly pretty yet bold and artistic.

To top it off, she also has adorable doggy clothing! This is fantastic for people who have dogs who like to wear very fashionable and sparkly clothing. You and your dog can wear similar styles, if that’s your thing.

With all the lovely and fun embellishments on the human and doggy clothing, you might think (as I did) that these items must be impossible to clean. But surprisingly, some of them are actually machine washable! The ones that aren't are hand-washable and/or dry-clean-able.

Since holiday shopping time is upon us, ByJuliePie tops and dresses could make for beautiful gifts for friends, and as ByJuliePie says, for “you daughter and your pooch!”

The Deadly Effects on Humans of Sarah Palin’s Book

While watching this segment from last night’s Daily Show, I realized that the adorable young children to whom John Oliver read excerpts from Sarah Palin’s book (Going Rogue) have clearly been watching David Letterman’s series, “Things More Fun than Reading the Sarah Palin Memoir.”

The children’s examples of things that would be more fun than hearing a reading of Going Rogue closely parallel those of The Late Show with David Letterman. I believe my jocularity regarding the young children’s viewing of The Late Show is obvious. However, the analogous reactions formed by the young children and David Letterman and his writing staff indicates a potentially universal human reaction to Sarah Palin’s memoir – a reaction involving a preference for violent destruction, physical torture, and even suicide over being exposed to the intensely boring torture of Going Rogue.

This clearly elucidates the very obvious fact that Sarah Palin is evil and perhaps even dangerous to all humans, but particularly to young children. Won’t someone please think of the children?! Sarah Palin’s perilous evil is even recognized by the Mayans, who, according to David Letterman, states that their calendar does predict that "the world will end in 2012, but not from floods, earthquakes, or fires,” but rather from the threat of a Sarah Palin presidency.

This brings me to another segment from last night’s Daily Show. Simply put, I agree almost whole-heartedly with Jon Stewart. He presents the belief of the conservative media that we non-conservatives hate Sarah Palin because she is pretty, she hunts, and she’s Alaskan. That is clearly not the case at all. I actually want to like her because she is pretty. I know, that’s wrong, it’s anti-feminist, etc, but it’s just how I feel. Also, she looks a bit like my mother, whom I love like my own mother (probably because she is my own mother), so that’s actually another reason I want to like Sarah Palin. I don’t particularly like her hunting, it seems wrong, especially when she hunts from a helicopter. But I can’t really hate someone who eats what they hunt, for as a non-vegetarian, I’m one step away from doing that as well, though I could never kill anything directly…I mean, except for spiders and some other insects. Regarding her Alaskan origins, I certainly don’t hate her because she lives in Alaska – that’s ridiculous. The only reason I might hate Alaskans is that they elected Sarah Palin governor. Other than that, I don’t have any problem with Alaskans. I mean, it’s not like they’re New Jerseyans. Anyway, I can forgive the Alaskans for electing her since she resigned as their governor so she could write her memoirs.

So, no, I don’t hate her for those superficial reasons as conservative news people from the land of Fox News might like to believe. Rather, I hate her for, as Jon Stewart says, her emptiness, her non-substantiveness, “the nothing…a conservative boiler plate mad-lib…delivered as though it were the hard-earned wisdom of a life well lived…It’s…the boasting about [her] straight-shootin’, when [she’s] not straight shootin’, [she’s] just a talking point machine.”

But I also hate her on those occasions where she does have some degree of substance. I hate her for her overly conservative political beliefs. I have no problem at all with people believing things that differ from what I believe, of course, but I do have a problem with people who feel they should impose those beliefs, particularly religious beliefs, on the rest of the world. That is precisely what Sarah Palin wants to do. Things like forcing her pro-life perspective on women who should have the right to decide what to do with their bodies and abstinence-only sex education – these are some of the reasons I hate Sarah Palin.

Another reason I hate Sarah Palin is discussed in this segment from last night’s Colbert Report. In Going Rogue, Sarah Palin does not take responsibility for anything; she blames others for anything that goes wrong. Additionally, Going Rogue is factually flawed, and she can’t even accept responsibility for that; it’s not her fault, it’s the fault of the fact-checkers who dare to bring her false facts to light.

I hope that reading this blog has been more fun than reading Sarah Palin’s book.

SPOILER ALERT: Did Jennifer Morrison Choose to Leave House MD?

As I state in a previous blog posting, there’s recently been talk of Cameron (Jennifer Morrison) partially leaving House MD, expected to only return as a guest star. This departure was confirmed on last night’s episode (“Teamwork”) when she left her husband (Chase (Jesse Spencer)), the hospital (Princeton-Plainsboro), and presumably moved away.

As I suspected, Cameron's departure did not result from any decision of Jennifer Morrison. She talks about her own surprise at the writers' decision for Cameron to leave the hospital in this Entertainment Weekly article. She does imply that the writers are simply remaining true to the character (though she almost evades stating that directly).

I think Cameron’s departure is true to her character; she runs away from things she doesn't want to continue to face. When Amber died, she advised Wilson not to run away like he wanted to, because he could never run away from the memory of Amber or the painful memory of her death. She knew this because she had run far away when her first husband died, but no matter where she is, the memories stay with her.

So it isn’t at all surprising that Cameron would run away when her marriage with Chase fails, or that she would run away when she realizes she can't face what she sees as House's and Chase's remorseless immorality.

Speaking of morality, I’m very happy to see (in the same article mentioned above) that Jennifer Morrison will be paid for the rest of the season even if she’s not in it, since she clearly did not expect to be (partially) written out of the show.

I’m rather sad to see Cameron (the character) and Jennifer Morrison (the actress) partially leave House MD. This does not contradict what I’ve said in the previous blog posting (mentioned above), where I have stated that I would rather see Cameron go then Thirteen; that does not mean that I do want to see Cameron go, and I heart Cameron, but I heart Thirteen more. Anyhoo, Cameron adds elements of morality and compassion that are somewhat (or in some cases very) lacking in other characters (whom I also love), and I think that added some balance to the show. Hopefully her occasional reappearances will suffice. But as I have said in that blog posting I mentioned above, I would be a lot more upset if other characters (like Thirteen) were to leave. So overall, I’m happy.

I Heart the Beach

There is nothing quite like the beach on a warm autumn day, with the sun shining in the perfect clear blue sky, and the water glistening in the sunshine. As the tide comes in, the approaching waves sparkle in the sun, and as they crash gently like tiny tsunamis on the shore, the peacefulness of it all fills my soul. The sound of crashing ocean waves is the most wonderful sound in the world. I feel healed by the ocean, the soft sand beneath my feet, the warm breeze brushing past me, and as I breathe the freshest air, smelling the clean fragrance of the first warm day after a stretch of cold days before it, I’m filled with soothing, blissful elation.

I would want to live at the beach, if, you know, there weren’t actual tsunamis and hurricanes to be feared.

The Arrogance of Shinedown

(Originally written as an email on April 25, 2009)

I was watching the VH1 Top 20, and the annoying man who hosts it [Jim Shearer, who’s become less annoying since this was written] was introducing Shinedown’s “Second Chance” video. He says that the lead singer [Brent Smith] has said that their newest CD (The Sound of Madness) is not only the best CD Shinedown has made, but it also compares favorably to any other album in musical history.

Wow, I can't believe I own the greatest CD ever recorded; that's pretty amazing haha. It sounded like Jim Shearer might've been exaggerating what the shiny man said. I hope he was, because really, that's a little bit arrogant. As Jim Shearer sarcastically said, The Sound of Madness is clearly better than albums of artists like The Beatles, Michael Jackson, etc (I’m loosely paraphrasing).

Omg, Jim Shearer was not exaggerating at all. Brent Smith did say those things. Maybe he was just really excited about their shiny work.

I think I do agree with Brent Smith in that The Sound of Madness probably is the best CD Shinedown has made thus far, and it is a really good CD in general. But clearly the greatest CD ever recorded is either Fallen (Evanescence), 21st Century Breakdown (Green Day), American Idiot (also Green Day), Breakaway (Kelly Clarkson), The Black Album (Metallica), S&M (also Metallica), or The Fifth Symphony (Beethoven)…

Pink’s Abusive Lyrics

UPDATE: December 5, 2009
Thanks to Tiger Woods and his wife, this blog posting has more relevance now! See what I write here for why.

(Originally written as an email on August 12, 2009)

I was kind of liking that Pink song, "Please Don't Leave Me," although I vaguely noticed something a little abusive about the lyrics. So today, I listened to the lyrics, and holy crap, either Pink is an abusive POS, or maybe she is singing from the voice of an abusive POS. But the lyrics are clearly the words of an abusive POS.

I was kind of thinking at first that maybe she's just reacting to an abusive POS, but she says things like "I don't know why I’m so obnoxious, something about you makes me act that way" and "You're my perfect little punching bag"....What an abusive POS.

I hope she's just singing from the abuser's voice...I like a lot of her music, including that song, lol. Also, I like her, or I did anyway.

(I wrote another email about a half hour later)

Um, so maybe Pink is not an abusive POS. Someone told me to watch the video, which shows her trying to kill her boyfriend but then sings all sweetly, "Please don't leave me.” I know this description sounds just as terrible as I thought the lyrics were, but it's funny-like, and very clearly showing the irony of it.

A couple of people informed me that it’s an homage to a movie called Misery, which I have not seen. As one of those people notes, Pink is a funny girl, and so the lyrics and video are intended as humor. I probably should have realized that.

In this video, Pink explains the meaning of the song, and here she says that she and her mom are both a**holes, but they're also loveable, and have the whole "go away...no come back" kind of personalities.

Anyhoo, the lyrics are still the things abusive people would say, but I do like Pink and her music, and that song is good, and she is a funny girl, and I do see the intended humor.

Hmm, here's an interesting thought: If a man were singing it (let's say Chris Brown, i.e. a known abusive POS), and Pink (or Rihanna, or any other woman) was the recipient of it, I wonder if anyone would say it's funny...So yeah, while I see the humor and I still like Pink and while I’m no longer feeling that she's an abusive POS (because of the humor and obvious irony in the video), I’m still a bit uncomfortable with the lyrics. Maybe I should see this movie Misery...

Evolving Perceptions of Lady Gaga

My hatred of Lady Gaga (whose real name is Stefani Germanotta) was immediate, from the moment she entered my consciousness. She is just a wannabe Christina Aguilera (whom I love, and whose talent is unquestionable; if there was ever any doubt regarding Christina’s talent, her impromptu a cappella performance of “Beautiful” on Saturday Night Live very clearly elucidates her talent), I thought, as I’m sure many people did. So, as I mention in my previous blog posting, I hated Lady Gaga for what I thought was: an obvious lack of originality. I thought she was a derivative and therefore fake pop singer who, beyond her lack, of originality, appeared to lack talent. Another Paris Hilton-like pop quasi-singer, manufactured to sound decent.

I was informed at some point that according to Perez Hilton, Lady Gaga is, in fact, original. Apparently, he provides evidence that Lady Gaga’s fashion precedes Christina’s, so, assuming he is correct (which I do), Lady Gaga is original and therefore is not fake. Yet I continued to hate her, despite the elimination of my perception of her as a wannabe Christina.

Her music itself didn’t anger me quite so much; I kind of like “Just Dance,” though I couldn’t listen to the whole song since it just got annoying. I did (and continue to) like “Poker Face,” but I hated (and continue to hate) “LoveGame.” I also continued to hate her.

My hatred began to change when I saw the 2009 MTV Video Music Awards, where Lady Gaga performed “Paparazzi.” Until then, I hadn’t heard the song at all; I occasionally reside under a rock where I somehow manage to (usually inadvertently) avoid any exposure to new music or celebrity and newsly goings on. As I watched the very dramatic performance, I found myself…enjoying it…a lot. This came as quite a shock to me. The song was fantastic. More notably, it became clear that she actually does sing, and her voice is kind of good and unique in that its distinctiveness makes the Lady-Gaga-ness unmistakably recognizable. In addition to her singing talent, I noticed she plays the piano as well. I had seen her perform “Poker Face” on American Idol where it was evident that she actually sings and also plays the piano, but somehow her talent didn’t strike me then; my hatred at the time was too strong because I hadn’t yet learned of her originality and so I still thought she was a wannabe Christina at the time. But at the VMAs, the song and her talent struck me, and I began to realize that she is not only original in her fashions, but she seems to have some real talent too. My hatred was dissolving, and I was beginning to like her.

My hatred further dissolved as I watched her further demonstrate her talent on SNL, where in her second performance of a medley of her songs, she appeared to improvise on the piano and with the singing. I was impressed. I didn’t see the whole episode at the time, so I had missed her talent-displaying performance of "Paparazzi" as well as her rather funny appearance in this funny sketch. Apparently she has comedic talent as well as musical talent.

Then, a few weeks ago, I heard somewhere (probably on MTV or VH1) that Lady Gaga had spoken and performed at a Human Rights Campaign dinner, and then participated in the National Equality March on the mall in Washington DC, and that she had stated that it was the most important thing she has ever done in her career. Upon hearing this, very much to my surprise, I thought to myself “I love Lady Gaga, she is awesome.” I am a huge fan of equality and of not discriminating, and also of GLBT people and their rights, so it truly warmed my heart to hear that Lady Gaga shares my love for the gays. My perception of Lady Gaga was fully transformed. My initial hate-filled perceptions were based on misconceptions. She is a talented performer, and a kind-hearted person.

Since antipathy had turned to admiration and fanliness (if it hasn’t become obvious, I like to make up words), I became interested in how far her talent goes. Apparently, before releasing her own album (for which she wrote most of the music and lyrics), she had been writing songs for other singers. More interestingly, her talent seems to be quite a natural one; she learned to play the piano by ear when she was four years old, and has been writing music since she was 13. She is vastly more talented than I had thought, and is the antithesis of the Paris-Hilton-esque quasi-singer that I thought she was.

Since I now love her, I find that I like her music more than I had. However, I still hate “LoveGame,” both the song and the video, but that could just be because I’m not much of a fan of pornography.

UPDATE December 24, 2009
Since writing this blog posting, my love for Lady Gaga has grown. Since then, I've seen her in a few interviews on the TV, where she appears to be a genuinely kind and sweet human being who loves her fans and always remains true to herself. Additionally, "Bad Romance" in particular and The Fame Monster as a whole are fantastically good. Shockingly, "LoveGame" has grown on me, and now I kind of like the song, though I continue to not like the video.

I heart Lady Gaga.

UPDATE February 1, 2010
As if I didn’t already love Lady Gaga enough, she just keeps making me love her more. She kindly donated proceeds from a concert and from merchandise to Haiti earthquake relief efforts. I know a lot of celebrities do things like that, and I love every one of them.

Lady Gaga’s sweet, genuine kindness pours from her in interviews, including Oprah’s interview, where Gaga said about her fans, “I want them to free themselves, and I want them to be proud of who they are. I want them to celebrate all the things they don't like about themselves the way that I did, and to be truly happy from the inside.” She said something similar to that (somewhere, possibly also on Oprah) about the meaning behind “Bad Romance.” She explained that the song is about loving someone for everything he or she is, for all the good, all the bad, and all the things the person doesn’t like about him or herself. She spoke as though these are the things she wants, and, therefore, she read my mind…I think that might just be what every human wants, and she captures that perfectly.

If you missed her amazing performance with Elton John at the 52nd Grammy Awards last night, you should watch it right now – it’s fantastic. I was very happy to learn that she won two Grammys last night (during the un-televised portion) for “Poker Face” and The Fame. I love her so much.

I think a big part of what makes me love Lady Gaga is that she seems to have always felt like a freak and an outsider, and she makes such an effort to keep other people from feeling that way, or from feeling bad about being a freak or an outsider. I imagine most people (myself definitely included) have felt like freaks and like outsiders in some way, and Lady Gaga makes us realize we’re not alone. She is a wonderful human being.

UPDATE: May 23, 2011
The TV, or more specifically, the Fuse, has explained that what I called pornographic in the LoveGame video was an homage to Michael Jackson's "Bad" video.  I guess that makes it less gross, but still...ew.  In Gaga's defense, I think it's gross in the "Bad" video too.  I suppose I'm just too prudish.

Fox News Creates Britney Controversy (EXPLICIT LANGUAGE)

(Originally written as an email on March 29, 2009)

The following contains explicit and/or suggestive language, references to illegal drugs, and may contain animated nudity. Viewer discretion is advised.

I think this is funny....You know that Britney Spears song "If U Seek Amy"? I learned yesterday from the VH1 Top 20 and from Fox News that it's meant to be "IF u see ka(y) me" --> "F * C K Me." (That’s right -- I’m censoring the explicit language even though I warned you about it.)

It's rather funny that Fox News brought my attention to this, because I certainly wouldn't have noticed and when they did bring it to my attention, I had to think about it to get it. The people on Fox News didn't notice it either until it was brought to their attention, and they also had to think about it to get it.

If it takes these presumably intelligent adults on the TV and a slowly sharp-witted linguistics major like myself so much effort and attention-bringing to get it, why would they think innocent kids will get it? They actually say on there that kids are more savvy and will get it...I feel like that's not true, I think the innocent kids and innocent teens wouldn't get it, but the slutty teenagers who are already screwing each other or the kids who are already familiar with the cursed and evil f-word might get it, maybe.

I think it's pretty stupid for them to bring so much attention to it, since they're defeating their own purpose really. Furthermore, I think it's stupid to complain about this song's cryptically and barely verbalized explicit language rather than its slutty messages -- I mean, if they're going to complain about something.

Also, if they are complaining about the slutty messages, then they should complain about countless other things too -- things that are a lot more explicit than that -- because those are a lot less cryptic. It's also funny how they don't even mention what I think is an explicit drug reference, where Britney sings, "Is she smoking up outside?" Doesn't "smoking up" refer specifically to smoking the weed? In my day it did. That seems a lot more wrong to me.

Regarding my not getting of the F-*-C-K Me thing, I did actually sense that there was something sexual in the phrase "if you seek Amy," I just couldn't figure out what it was. I definitely noticed the weird/wrong grammar of "All of the boys and all of the girls are begging to if you seek Amy."

It really is pretty funny, once you get what she's saying, particularly the whole big section where she says "If you seek Amy tonight" repeatedly.

Anyhoo, I really don’t think kids would get it, and if they do get what the word is, I think there are far worse things they could hear. Regardless, I think it’s a great song.

While on the topic of music and lyrics, but otherwise completely unrelated, I think that Katy Perry and the man from Hinder should marry each other....They both sing about still being in love with an ex when they're with someone new ("Thinking of You" and "Lips of an Angel").

I hope you're not disappointed in the lack of animated nudity...I said this "may" contain it, like the disclaimers all the fox cartoons had for a while after that whole brouhaha Janet Jackson’s booby caused.

(On April 16, 2009, I wrote another related email)

Omfg! I f'ing heard “If U Seek Amy” on the (FM/terrestrial) radio, and they f'ing bleeped the "If U Seek Amy" part!!! Holy mother-f'ing sh*t, how the f are they bleeping the cryptically encoded cursing, but not bleeping the very obvious and clear drug reference, "Is she smoking up outside"?! That is so f'ing f'd up!

So it's wrong to publicly broadcast a barely understandable curse word, but it's perfectly okay to make smoking weed sound cool? I mean, the whole song is overtly and non-cryptically about how awesome Amy is, and the song suggests that Amy smokes weed, so obviously it's really cool to smoke the marijuana. You know that's how stupid kids (and stupid adults) will think. (Yes, I am suggesting that people who think it’s cool to do drugs are stupid.)

Furthermore, how the h*ll is it okay for that Christina wannabe Lady Gaga to sing (in "Just Dance") all about being so drunk on red wine that she doesn't know where she is or how her shirt got turned inside out? So the FCC apparently thinks it's good to encourage stupid kids to smoke the weed and get drunk enough to be date raped, right? But it's not okay to creatively and cryptically spell a profane word, so cryptically in fact, that reasonably intelligent adults don't get it even when it's brought to our attention, because even then we have to really think about it to get it. Britney is essentially censoring herself; it’s excessive for the radio to further censor her. Ironically, bleeping it really just draws attention to the profanity; it draws as much attention as Fox News complaining about it does.

Grr, this makes me so angry. I should smoke weed and get drunk and then tell people to if you seek Amy, because that's what the radio told me to do, and Britney, Amy, and Wannabe Christina are cool and I want to be just like them.

F*ck!

[It should be noted: I have never, nor will I ever part-take in any illegal drug use.]

[Please see my next blog posting about Lady Gaga and why I was wrong about her regarding my statements implying that she is a wannabe Christina Aguilera.]

So Not the Best Ice Cream Ever

Two people have recommended that I try green tea ice cream. Interestingly, both suggestions came after I raved about the perfection of Edy’s Slow Churned Ice Cream in one form or another (see previous blog posting for one of those forms).

I was a bit hesitant to try green tea ice cream, because I once had a green tea ice pop that a friend very accurately described as tasting like perfume. Obviously popsicles and ice cream are very likely to taste very different, so I finally tried green tea ice cream, with an open mind of course.

Since one of the people suggesting this specifically suggested Haagen-Dazs All Natural Green Tea Ice Cream, I decided to go with that, in the form of those little containers they have in supermarkets. Sadly, I was very much disappointed.

I tasted this ice cream the same way I sample every new flavor I try: with a big heaping tablespoon-full of the ice cream, taking small bites so as not to overwhelm my taste buds.

Upon taking the first bite, I exclaimed “Ew!” or some other outcry of disgust. Assuming that it must be an acquired taste, I then continued eating the rest of the heaping tablespoon of ice cream. With each small bite, it became increasingly less disgusting. By the end, it was not too bad. But I can’t say it was good.

In Green Tea Ice Cream’s defense, green tea is generally not my cup of tea, literally (hahahaha). But then again, when I was little, I hated coffee, but liked coffee ice cream. Anyway, I imagine green tea ice cream must be tasty for people who do enjoy actual green tea.

So to conclude, I was really unimpressed with the green tea ice cream. To its credit, however, at least it didn’t taste like perfume.

Best Ice Cream EVER!

Ok, maybe it’s just one of the best ice creams ever, but it’s definitely on the short list.

Which ice cream do I speak of you ask? Edy’s Slow Churned Red White and No More Blues (Limited Edition). It’s spectacular. I only discovered the gustatory joy of this incredibly delicious flavor recently, but apparently it’s been available all summer (which explains the patriotic nature of it).

I always thought there should be blueberry ice cream, and now there is. It far exceeds any expectations I might have had. I’m glad I caused this to come into existence (hehe). I wouldn’t have even thought of the delicious addition of strawberries to the blueberry ice cream I envisioned.

Its beautiful and patriotic swirls of delicious real (I’m assuming because it definitely tastes real) blueberries and strawberries intertwined throughout the deliciously rich and creamy, yet not-too-fattening slow churned vanilla ice cream. The enchanting flavors and smells explode like beautiful 4th of July fireworks. The smell of the blueberries and strawberries is intoxicating, and the berries burst with intense deliciousness, perfectly complimenting the incredible vanilla flavor. Edy’s Slow Churned vanilla is seriously the only vanilla ice cream (other than Carvel) that I truly enjoy, because it has a rich vanilla flavor that I don’t believe I’ve ever tasted elsewhere.

I’m certainly not an ice cream connoisseur, and I’m not even much of an ice cream person in general (I prefer chocolate and to a lesser extent cookies, but I certainly don’t hate other tasty confections). But this ice cream is truly spectacular, and it is one of the best flavors of Edy’s Slow Churned that I have tasted (and I’ve tasted many of their appetizing flavors). That says a lot, since Edy’s Slow Churned might just be the best (or definitely one of the best) forms of ice cream in existence. Its texture is far superior to most (or maybe all) other forms of ice cream. To top it off, it’s less fattening than most ice creams. Edy’s states that their Slow Churned Rich and Creamy Light Ice Creams lave less fat and fewer calories than regular ice cream, but that it tastes as good. I very much disagree – it tastes significantly better and has vastly better texture than regular ice cream.

I hope that Red White and No More Blues becomes so popular, and its yumminess becomes so well-known, that the “Limited Edition” portion of its name evaporates. I really hope Edy’s adds this to its more permanent collection of flavors.

SPOILER ALERT: Is Thirteen Leaving House MD?

UPDATE July 14, 2010
SPOILER ALERT - HOUSE SEASON 7
Well, it seems that Thirteen will temporarily be leaving House MD to do a movie that was co-written by one of the Lost producers (Damon Lindelof).  The House Facebook page posted this article about some other actress (Amber Tamblyn) being on a few episodes of House this coming season, and that article sent me to the one about Olivia Wilde (Thirteen).  Thirteen's impending temporary absence came as a surprise to me, because I apparently forgot that she said she would be taking a leave of absence in the season 6 finale.  Now that my memory has been jogged, I was rather worried about Thirteen at the end of last season -- I bet something is going on with her Huntington's Disease, or maybe there is something else somehow ailing her.  I hope she is okay, and it's funny how concerned we become for fictional characters.  Anyway, I'm glad her absence will only be temporary, and I'm glad the House producer said (in that article) that the story will all make sense, because it's nice when things make sense.

Original Posting from October 20, 2009 Begins Here
(MILD SPOILER ALERT - HOUSE SEASON 6)

I've been rather distraught at the thought of Thirteen (Olivia Wilde) appearing to be leaving House MD. So, to find out if Olivia will emerge from House MD oblivion, I google-news’d to see if there's any news about it.

According to this spoiler-containing thingie from Entertainment Weekly, Olivia Wilde's and Peter Jacobson's trailers have not been cleaned out, so hopefully they're not leaving. I mean, hopefully Thirteen isn't leaving, I'm sort of indifferent regarding Taub (Peter Jacobson). Poor Taub.

In my Google News searchings, I also saw a snippet containing a real spoiler, and I feel that I’ve been corrupted. It was about something specific happening in a December House MD episode. I don’t feel right sharing it with you, since I wish I hadn’t read it. Sorry.

But I will share another mild and less specific spoiler I found. In my searchings, I found this blog from The NY Times, where they say that Cameron (Jennifer Morrison) is leaving, and that was announced in September apparently. I know some people will be thrilled, since Chase-and-Cameron story-lines and b-stories can get incredibly irritating, but this totally sucks; as annoying as she can get, I heart Cameron, and I think the show needs her (and Chase (Jesse Spencer) too, but don't worry, I haven't seen anything about him leaving).

But if I had to choose, I would totally choose Thirteen over Cameron. That goes for both the characters and the actresses.

UPDATE November 5, 2209
MORE SPOILERS

Woohoo! It looks like we get to keep BOTH Thirteen AND Cameron! Yay! Apparently, both Olivia Wilde and Jennifer Morrison will be returning to House MD. The latter, however, might just be doing guest appearances after being absent from a few episodes, according to this spoiler-containing thing that House's Facebook fan page posted.

UPDATE November 17, 2009
QUASI-SPOILER ALERT

In last night's episode of House MD ("Teamwork"), Thirteen (Olivia Wilde) and Taub (Peter Jacobson) returned, confirming the above spoilers. As I discuss in this blog posting, we also saw Cameron (Jennifer Morrison) leaving as expected, which would've been sad if I hadn't known that (according to the above sources) she will be returning as a guest star in future episodes. Nonetheless, I will miss Cameron as a regular character. But I was very happy to see Thirteen, and somewhat strangely also Taub, return.

Comedians' Reactions to Letterman Scandal

After October 1, when David Letterman told the story of the alleged attempted extortion involving his affairs with women who worked for him, I wondered how his fellow comedians would react.

This blog from The Huffington Post and this article from the AP tell of what other comedians have been saying about Dave as of the weekend after his confession. It seems most are being easy on him or not talking about it at all. Jay Leno (The Jay Leno Show), Jimmy Fallon (Late Night), Seth Meyers (Saturday Night Live), and Craig Ferguson (The Late Late Show) have made jokes and comments about Dave’s scandal, but none of them were mean about it (towards Dave, that is; some were rightfully mean toward Robert "Joe" Halderman, the alleged blackmailer), which makes me happy.

In the week since Dave’s confession, Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert didn’t say a word about Letterman on The Daily Show and The Colbert Report, so they're with Conan O’Brien (The Tonight Show) and Jimmy Kimmel (Jimmy Kimmel Live!) in not talking about it, which also makes me happy.

I was very interested to know what Howard Stern thinks about Dave’s scandal.

If you read this article from The Examiner, you would think Howard Stern was hateful, and it almost sounds like Howard was screaming about how horrible Dave is. The article doesn’t misquote Howard, but it takes his statements out of context. If I hadn’t heard Howard myself and if I had only read that article, I would seriously hate Howard, and I’m a fan of Howard.

Since I did hear Howard talking about Dave, I can continue to love Howard (and Dave). As I expected and hoped for from Howard, he was completely honest about his thoughts about the situation. He made it clear that he likes Dave, and credits Letterman for always being supportive of him. He also said that Dave came out with this stuff in a brilliant way, and noted that he's a great communicator. But Howard felt that Dave screwing interns creates a really bad work environment where women feel they have to screw the boss to get ahead and men feel like they can't get ahead because they lack the necessary equipment. He also said if his daughters were taken advantage of as interns like that, he would cut off Dave's winkie. All these things are completely understandable, assuming that his affairs were, in fact with interns (I know Holly Hester came forward as having an affair with Dave while she was an intern), and if other interns and staff members were aware of those affairs at the time, and also assuming that Dave was abusing his position of power in the affairs, which we can't be sure of. I don't feel that Howard was mean-spirited towards Dave at all, as the Examiner article above might imply.

And finally, Dave’s reaction to himself was probably the funniest reaction of all the comedians. On the Monday after the confession, Dave spent almost the whole monologue cracking jokes about himself. He followed this hilarious monologue with another heartfelt statement apologizing to his staff and his wife for hurting them, as well as affirming that he did the right thing in confessing. Of course he ended the string of apologies with another apology to Sarah Palin, because it couldn’t hurt.

Dave has really been handling his scandal well. As both Howard Stern and Steve Martin have said, this scandal really does show us that Dave is human, and as Steve Martin noted, we really weren’t sure of that before.

I think the keep-quiet attitude and the lack of mean-spirited jokes from his fellow comedians show the reigning king of late night the respect that he still deserves, particularly since David Letterman is a victim of a felony.

Poor Dave

When I heard about the alleged extortion of David Letterman and his confession, my initial reaction was “Poor Dave.” This was followed by, “Wow, Dave’s a slut, who knew…But Poor slutty Dave.”

Obviously I’m talking about David Letterman’s recent confession of affair(s) he had with women who work for him and the blackmail involving that by Robert “Joe” Halderman, a producer of 48 Hours Mystery.

I first heard about it from my sister, because I had missed Thursday night’s Late Show containing his confession, and I had somehow not been exposed to any media most of yesterday.

I’ve been a fan of Dave’s since I was 14 or 15, and I’ve had a crush on him for most of that time (it dwindled in my early-to-mid twenties when he announced that his then-girlfriend and now-wife was pregnant). After seeing his confession on YouTube, and after reading this article from the AP, not only do I not hate him as some people now do, but my crush seems to be back. At first I thought this resulted from the reminder of his brooding self-criticism and the terrible things that have happened to him (such as the attempted kidnapping of his son and the crazy stalker) that the AP article spoke of.

But as I watched last night’s episode of The Late Show, and watched as the audience still loves him, I realized it was more than that. It was his honesty.

He could have easily played the victim – obviously he is a victim of alleged attempted extortion, but I mean he could have played the victim in ways that he is not – he could have, after explaining what happened with the attempted blackmail, proceeded to say “None of this is true; I did not have sexual relations with those women.” But he didn’t; he admitted that he had sexual relations with women who work for him. It’s not entirely surprising that his affairs would be with women who work for him, since both the woman he dated in the 1980s and his current wife were women who worked for him. (Much like the rest of the world seems to have assumed, I am assuming that there was no sexual harassment or other non-consensual behavior; if that assumption is proved untrue, that would change everything.)

As many have noted, including some blogging people on CNN, he doesn’t state when these things happened. The affairs could have, and probably did, happen before he got married in March, and perhaps even before his now-wife birthed his son. As the people on CNN say, we don’t know the nature of Dave and his now-wife’s relationship. Furthermore, even if he was cheating on her, we don’t know if she forgave him. And, as the bloggy people on CNN say, it’s really not our business.

It’s interesting that I wouldn’t hate someone who’s cheated on their significant other. Generally, I’m not a fan of cheating, and personally, I would never take part in any kind of infidelity. But we don’t’ know for sure that Dave’s actions constitute cheating, and even if they do, his honesty allows me to maintain my respect and love for him, and remain a fan, perhaps with enhanced fan-ness. His honesty doesn’t make cheating right, but it allows us as fans to maintain our love and respect for him. His confession also reminds us that his personal life, beyond what he chooses to reveal to us, is not our business.

While Dave’s celebrity status places him in the public eye, he has kept much of his personal life private. He is not an elected official who is trying to legislate morality (again, I think the bloggy people on CNN, the AP, and probably many others said something along those lines as well). He’s a comedian, and therefore, not a hypocrite for his countless jokes about politicians and other celebrities and their indiscretions, because his job is to make jokes. His personal life and his hypocrisy (if you believe he is a hypocrite) are not relevant to those jokes.

I can’t help but wonder if I would feel the same way if this were happening to a celebrity whom I don’t love. Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’m biased, but I think I would feel similarly, if not as strongly, if it were someone I hated, because the extortion involved is wrong – I mean more wrong than the potential infidelity.

Fun side note about my little Dave obsession: Before watching the blogging people on CNN, upon hearing that Dave’s affairs were with women who work for him, I immediately speculatively concluded that one of them (or perhaps the only one) must have been his assistant who’s made on-air appearances over the years. I won’t say her name here, because that wouldn’t be right, but one of the bloggers on the CNN thing confirms my suspicion, I assume speculatively. Before I knew she existed, when I was a teenager, I dreamed of having her job – so it should have been me…hahahaha, just kidding….maybe….no, no, I am kidding.

I Cheated on Google

Dearest Google, I’ve been unfaithful to you. I’m sorry to be so blunt, Google, but the truth had to come out, especially now, since the time of repentance is upon us.

My transgression occurred a few weeks ago. I was googling something obscure – I had heard something about heavy metals being present in calcium carbonate, the very calcium supplement I take.

But Google, my beloved, you couldn’t find any relevant results, at least not in the first pages of search results, and, Google, you know I don’t look beyond the first few pages generally.

So I tried Bing. Yes, Bing. Like you, Google, it has a cute and amusing name. I once searched Bing before, when I saw their commercial on the TV, purely out of curiosity. At that time, it appeared as though Bing’s results were very similar to yours, Google. So using Bing seemed pointless, for why stray from my beloved Google when there appears to be no additional benefit to Bing.

But on that fateful (and unfaithful) day, Google, when you couldn’t satisfy my web searching needs, I did the very same search at Bing that I had tried at you, Google (I don’t remember what I specifically searched for). And Bing found exactly what I was looking for, right there in the first web result.

There was an article from 2000 talking about a JAMA study that had found lead in a few brands of calcium carbonate, though the amounts were less than one would ingest from food and are (or at least were in 2000) acceptable by FDA standards. It stated that Caltrate (the brand I used to use until it became increasingly more difficult to find the kind I like that contains no Vitamin D since I take that separately; my stopping of Caltrate came long before I discovered its lead content) contained these detectable though safe amounts of lead, but Walgreen’s brand (the one I switched to) contained no detectable lead at all. Tums also contained no lead, which is nice. This is the thing Bing found.

But don’t worry Google, this doesn’t mean I’m leaving you. I still love you dearly, and you remain superior to Bing in other ways. I tried the Bing toolbar -- again, purely out of curiosity, and it was useless. Its only purpose is the search box, which sits in an obtrusive and unattractive blemish in my Internet Explorer (perhaps the Bing toolbar blends more nicely in Vista or Windows 7). The Google Toolbar, on the other hand, blends beautifully and modestly, and contains all those other useful thingies like Autofill, Pop-up Blocker, and other nice features. Also, Google, you have all those other products that I love so dearly, and that I surely could not be happy without.

Rest assured, My Dearest Google, that I will only use Bing on those very rare occasions when you can’t find something. This likely won’t happen often, since this was the first time it did, since that glorious day 8 or 10 years ago when I first googled, after someone on The Late Show with David Letterman website mentioned you, Google. I had never been happy with any search engine before you, Google; you almost always find exactly what I’m looking for.

Are you still upset about my unfaithfulness, Google? Doesn’t it help that my transgression was with Microsoft? You’ve known I’ve had a relationship with Microsoft since Windows 95, Google. But I understand, web searching is your territory, Google, and I’m sorry. I hope you will forgive me Google.

I love you, Google. But I also love Microsoft (most of the time).

ABC/Disney is Discriminating against DVD Users!

I make this outlandish claim because I have discovered (well, they make it blatantly obvious) that Lost University will be exclusive to the Blu-ray version of the fifth season.

I was so ridiculously excited about Lost University when I saw Lost’s Myface (Facebook) fan page post something about it back in July. I couldn’t wait to enroll – it seems so incredibly interesting. I even felt that they had stolen and then morphed my idea, since I had thought it would be a great idea to have books like The Philosophy of Lost, The Psychology of Lost, and The Gospel According to Lost, like they do for The Simpsons, and it seemed that’s what Lost University was all about, sort of.

UPDATE April 29, 2010
I suddenly felt compelled to see whether the Lost books I envisioned might, in fact, already exist, and they do!  Well, 2 out of 3 -- The Psychology of Lost doesn't appear to exist at this time, but Lost and Philosophy and The Gospel According to Lost do exist!  Woohoo!

I had hoped at the time that they were only suggesting the purchase of Lost Season 5 on Blu-ray. But after I excitedly enrolled today, I discovered that not only is that a requirement, but almost the whole University exists solely on the Blu-ray. It’s not even on the DVD!

I vowed never to buy Blu-ray discs, largely because I do not own anything that will play such a format. I also vowed never to buy Windows Vista, and thanks to Windows 7, I will never have to, so it worked. (It seems my Blu-ray avoidance might have to come to an end at some point in the future, according to Wikipedia.)

I wasn’t even sure I would be willing to buy the DVD of Season 5, but if Lost University would be on it, I probably would have. But now I won’t. I won’t buy any Lost DVD now, in protest of their exclusionary behaviors.

Hey, ABC/Disney, why don’t you put Lost University on a separate DVD if you don’t want to put it on the Season 5 DVD? I would definitely buy that, even if it’s just the non-interactive portions. Or better yet, why not put the whole thing online, you know, like at the Lost University website that already exists (see link below)? You could throw some ads on there and make money that way, or you could even charge “students” to enroll. Despite my proclivity towards cheapness, I would probably pay for such a fun, exciting, and interesting online university. But I won’t buy a Blu-ray player just for the joys of said university.

If you own a Blu-ray player and want to enroll, or if you want to enroll and see what you can get out of it without the stupid Blu-ray like I’m doing, go here:

http://www.lostuniversity.org/

UPDATE January 24, 2010
Well, so much for that – I caved. Amazon has (or had – I don’t know how long the sale will last, if it’s not over already) the DVDs of all the past seasons (1-5) for really low prices, so I bought them – all of them. It was a difficult decision – I was filled with guilt for betraying my own (pointless) cause. My sister was kind enough to allow me to “pretend” I bought it for her (which works out nicely if they end up releasing a fabulous box set of the complete series that I would obviously need to buy), but alas, it is still a betrayal of my non-worthy cause. What can I say, I’m weak.

Of course, the Blu-ray versions of all 5 seasons are (or were ) also on sale at Amazon, but their sale prices are still high, of course, because it’s Blu-ray, and Blu-ray is expensive.

I really hope they put the Lost U things on a DVD, even if it is just the non-interactive potions, because (assuming it would be cheap enough) I would buy that.

The Magical Brilliance of Ben Moody

(Originally posted as a Myspace blog, Sunday, April 29, 2007, 2:10 PM)

If you don't know who Ben Moody is, he's the former Evanescence guy who's been spreading his brilliance throughout the world of pop music. When he left Evanescence, I was heart-broken, but Amy Lee (and the rest of Evanescence) and Ben Moody have clearly influenced each other such that they have each continued to create some of the best music I've ever heard. But it seems that most of the public doesn't get to hear what I feel are among the best Ben Moody has contributed to....and that is the purpose of this blog...

Ben Moody (along with David Hodges) co-wrote "What About Now," which is by far the best song on the otherwise amazing Daughtry (self-titled) CD. Despite the utter perfection and beauty of this song (incredible music, incredible lyrics, and Chris Daughtry's incredible voice and talent), I get the sense that it will never see the light of radio play, perhaps destined to suffer the same fate as Kelly Clarkson's Addicted (also co-written by Ben Moody (with David Hodges and Kelly Clarkson)), also the best song on her otherwise amazing CD (Breakaway).

Both songs reach directly into your soul, into the deepest sulci of your brain, touching you emotionally like few things can; they're both the kind of songs that you stop what you're doing because you're just so mesmerized by the intensely beautiful sounds and you just listen and feel it...Yet you never hear about these songs; they don't appear to be given the chance to shine in the public's eye as singles.

It seems that it's too late for "Addicted" (Kelly Clarkson) since she seems to have a new CD on the way, but it's not too late for "What About Now" (Daughtry)...I hope I'm shown to be wrong, I hope it does find its way onto the playlists...

Interesting side note: As of the time of this blog posting, both Evanescence and Ben Moody have yet to accept me as Myspace friends...I've only been requesting their myspacely friendship for 6 or 7 months...

P.S. I realized I used a jargon-y word, so here's a definition:
"Sulci" is the plural form of Sulcus (because it's Latin). A sulcus is a fissure on your brain. Gyri (singular = gyrus) are the protrusions that sort of bubble out between the sulci.

I hope you've enjoyed this very brief lesson in neuroscience :-)

Updates (via comments I posted on the Myspace version of this blog)

June 23, 2007
Woohoo! Ben Moody accepted my offer of myspacely friendship! But alas, I continue to wait for Evanescence...

July 7, 2007 (07/07/07, a numerically exciting day!)
And the day has come, that I shall wait no more, for Evanescence has, at long last, accepted my myspacely friendship :-)

February 23, 2008
I was elated to see this week on American Idol, the Moody-Daughtry brilliance shining beautifully as "What About Now" played over some sort of montage of contestants. As far as I know, it's not a single (yet), but at least it's getting some public exposure :-)

July 3, 2008
Woohoo! I heard "What About Now" on the radio today! And they called it a new song!

My work here is done :-) This clearly happened because of me and my little blog! You're welcome, world!

Now, what shall I cause the world to do next...

Update:
Now, I mean September 7, 2009
Obviously "What About Now" has become rather popular, and appears to be loved by all humans. I'm so awesome for discovering it, and for causing it's success :-) hehehe

Ben Moody finally released his own CD called All for This (actually, I believe it's a CD-R), which you can download at Amazon (like I did). Obviously, Daughtry and Kelly Clarkson also have new CDs (Leave This Town and All I Ever Wanted respectively) which are also quite good :-)

I Can be all Poetical-like! (Hehehe)

UPDATE February 15, 2011

OMG!  I just discovered that Eminem coincidentally plagiarized my title!  On his 2010 CD, Recovery, the first track is called...wait for it..."Cold Wind Blows"!  I wrote and published my poem with the same title in 2007.  Eminem obviously read my blog and stole my title!  Please note, I'm obviously just kidding, though it is a strange coincidence. that demonstrates my talent hahaha.

(Originally posted as a Myspace blog, Sunday, February 4, 2007, 8:35 PM)


Cold Wind BlowsAs I walk through the bitter cold
The icy wind stings mine eyelids
And the phalanges that doth lie
Directly betwixt their brethren upon each glov'd upper appendage
Doth feel as though frost perchance hath bitten them
As the sanguineous humor enveloping my phalanges
Shrinks back in fear
Of its nemesis, the cold wind
That doth penetrate mine Old Navy fleece

(I know, I am hilarious!)

Introduction to My Blog

Hello, and welcome to my blog!

I never thought I would be a blogger, beyond the little Myspace blog that I almost never use, but alas, here I am!

I decided to start blogging because I occasionally have thoughts about things, and I then feel compelled to write those thoughts. I’ve previously shared those thoughts with a handful of friends, via fun and interesting emails (well, I find them fun and interesting anyway). So I’ve decided to share them with the world! Yay! :-)

To begin, I thought it might be fun to post a bunch of out-dated things – things that were not out-dated when I wrote them. Don’t worry, after that, things won’t be quite as out-dated as I post them (assuming I continue with the blogging). These first out-dated postings will come from my Myspace blog and from emails that I’ve written. I will try to post them chronologically, but try not to be sad if that doesn’t happen.

I realize I’m a bit late joining this blogging bandwagon, but I guess that’s my style :-) Next, maybe I’ll join Twitter!

I hope you enjoy my blog! Do you think I said “blog” enough? Blog!!!

UPDATE January 27, 2010
I finally joined Twitter! I probably won't tweet anything, but Conan O'Brien is now on Twitter, so obviously I had to join just so I could follow him!